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About Varied / Student Member J-GothUnited States Recent Activity
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J-Goth

Artist | Student | Varied
United States
Someone once critiqued the way that I write my poetry's subject and narrator. For the most part, I write using "I", "you", "we", "he", "she", and "us". This is just the I try to make the connection between my work and readers. The "we" could be you and me, or the "I" and "you" could be from your point of view directed towards someone you love, or someone you hate, or someone who hurt you. Making this connection is important to me. I've always written with the intention of making people feel something.
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~Waning Heart~




She's my heart,
She gives me life from my chest,
To the tips of my toes and back,
To my brain where there's nothing but static,
All I ever wanted was to know what I wanted,
To make sense of my thoughts,

The night terrors plague me,
When I forget how fragile life is.
I want to be free,
Afraid to play a role in my own ruin,
I feel something biting me that I cannot shake,
A stinging, throbbing pain,

Fear,
All I ever dreamed of was to usher this heart into a future,
One worth wanting and not paying the price,
Regretting not reaching for it when it was close,
My heart is just as silly as the fantasy,
To which I retreat so as not to remember where I am,

I cannot fool me,
Brain buzzing,
Trying to find answers,
I don't know what to tell myself,
She's getting irritated because she's in pain,
I don't know how to stop it,

She will never trust me again.





Waning Heart © J-Goth/Amanda P.
right now. It's called The Unlucky Ones, I started it yesterday and I'll be working on it today so that I'll have it up soon and then I'll have an even shorter horror tidbit that I mentioned in a previous journal. I'm going to try and post as much quality art as I can while I'm off. I hope you all like them, thank you so much for reading and for your comments.
I feel like there's a terrible monster inside of me because it's how people have always made me feel. I'm so afraid of what I would do if I wasn't as harmless as I am. I want to be nice, kind, and genuine, but at the same time I often imagine things I could get away with if I had the mind, looks, money, power, status, and connections. Everyone that ever hurt me, I would hurt. Everyone and everything that I wanted, I would manipulate to get. It would feel so good to be able to be completely selfish, I mean, I'm selfish now but not all the time. The worst are the times I think about doing things to people who haven't hurt me at all -- since I'm not quite willing to get therapy, I'll do what I've always done and channel it into writing. Which brings me to the point of this journal, I'm going to write a couple of shorts, one; a whimsical fantasy-type horror thing, the other; fetishism, horror, gorey, nsfw-type thing. So hopefully it gets me to feel less terrible and entertains you guys. 
~Wanting~





I want you to smell like me,
Those reminders of me all over your neck,
your back,
and your feet,
I'll bring the blood to the surface of your pale white skin,
kiss you hard enough to leave bruises nice and big,
I want to feel your heart beating,
under my tongue,
eyes like the sun shining upon the trees of a misty forest,
red lips,
vulnerable,
body eager for my assault,
misunderstood,
fresh out the cocoon,
you're gone when I open my eyes,
I don't remember being so greedy,
but I devoured what you left,
can't grow anymore,
feeling sick,
missing you.





Wanting © J-Goth/Amanda P.
Wanting
I had these words in my head buzzing around and they sounded so pretty I had to post them. Enjoy/leave feedback. 
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I've revised and titled my last poem of 2014, it's now called Without Fear. 2014 was a difficult year for a lot of reasons but I'm glad it's behind us.
right now. It's called The Unlucky Ones, I started it yesterday and I'll be working on it today so that I'll have it up soon and then I'll have an even shorter horror tidbit that I mentioned in a previous journal. I'm going to try and post as much quality art as I can while I'm off. I hope you all like them, thank you so much for reading and for your comments.

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:iconmarco-e:
MARCO-E Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2015
Tag a quality deviant, You’re it!FREE flying hearts Icon  Quality doesn't mean that you have a lot of followers, or a lot of messages. It means that you’re nice to other people, and you deserve to be happy. :love: If you get this message, someone is telling you that they love you as you are, and they don’t care how much followers you have. Send this to 10 deviants who deserve it. If you break the chain, nothing will happen. But it’s just good to let someone know that you love them! Heart Balloon Emote 
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:iconj-goth:
J-Goth Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2015  Student General Artist
I love you too! :blackrose:
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:iconmarco-e:
MARCO-E Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2015
:heart: !!
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:iconmarco-e:
MARCO-E Featured By Owner Jan 5, 2015
Thank you...thank you so much
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:iconjohnpatience:
JohnPatience Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2014
Thanks for the fave  :)
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:iconj-goth:
J-Goth Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2014  Student General Artist
Your work is incredible. I've never seen anything like it. You deserve many faves. Do you do commissions?
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:iconjohnpatience:
JohnPatience Featured By Owner Sep 29, 2014
Thanks very much indeed.
No I'm afraid I don't do commissions. I was a professional illustrator for about thirty years and worked to meet publishers requirements, now I'm retired and have only myself to please; I like it that way.  :)
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:iconj-goth:
J-Goth Featured By Owner Sep 30, 2014  Student General Artist
Ah! That's understandable. I would hate to wear out something I love to do and I feel like doing it to please people is something that would put me in that direction. I always ask a new artist I find if I could buy something from them to show my support. However, I think you have more experience and talent than I could afford so you're good. I'll just go on admiring what I see here. And thank you. 
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(1 Reply)
:iconmarco-e:
MARCO-E Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2014
Thanks for watching again :):hug:
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:iconj-goth:
J-Goth Featured By Owner Aug 17, 2014  Student General Artist
no problem! 
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